Things That go Bump in the Night

This past weekend was terrifying for me and I'm not just talking about South Carolina losing to Tennessee by 2 points in the last few seconds of the game... because that was pertty horrible. I'm referring to a haunted house known as Bennett's Curse in Jessup, Maryland that was absolutely one of the scariest adventures I have ever been on. If you know me at all, you know I am FREAKED OUT by haunted houses. I don't know why but I seriously have panic attacks and go crazy even though I know it isn't real. Just click on the link to their website and you can tell that it's no joke in that place. I made the mistake of reading about this attraction, which has been featured on the Travel Channel and was also voted scariest haunt in Baltimore/Washington for the past 5 years, so I think I had it hyped up so much in my head that it was even scarier when I actually went in. The tickets range in prices depending on if you want VIP treatment (i.e., you don't want to wait in line because they can get pretty long) but we opted for the $30 general admission tickets because even those tickets come with some perks. For example, there is a Bavarian Beer Garden called Blob's Park right beside Bennett's Curse that sometimes has a cover charge, but if you go into the haunted house, they will waive your cover charge. So that's kind of nice if you go on a super busy night when there's a cover. It wasn't very busy at all on the night we went so there weren't long lines for the haunted houses (there's 3 different haunted houses inside this one giant dome) and there was no cover for Blob's Park. Anyway, let me break this crazy horrifying place down for you.

Basically it's THREE haunted houses in ONE and they were all pretty legit as far as monster makeup and levels of scariness. When you enter, this super creepy guy follows you all the way to the ticket lady so you are immediately ready to get out as fast as possible. He eventually gets to the door and it turns out, he's a vampire they hired to give you the rules. No running, no touching anything, no pictures and no turning back. The last rule was incredibly difficult for me because as soon as he said it, I wanted to turn around. We bravely lined up and entered the darkness. This is where the journey became really uncomfortable for my fiance because I literally had a death grip on his shirt and refused to let go no matter how much he was swatting me. I also kept burying my head in his back... sorry, C., but it couldn't be helped. 

The first phase of the dome is "House of the Vampyres." When you walk in, you know there is no Edward Cullen around the corner to sparkle and light your way through. Oh no, shit stuff gets real. They have real people dressed up in the most elaborate makeup (no wonder they were featured on Making Monsters) and they also have insane mechanical aspects too. We rounded one corner and was face to face with this GINORMOUS vampire head that shot out of the wall and was seriously about to eat me. This monster also had a giant hand that came out as well, and while I didn't see it, apparently it cut our friends off from us altogether and they had to squeeze by to escape and catch up to us. When leaving the Vampire phase, a wall LITERALLY starts to shut you in, so you have to hurry it up before you are crushed. I'm sure they don't actually crush people, but if you're claustrophobic, it's going to be a bad time. 

Then begins phase two: "Zombie Kingdom 3D!" That's right... 3D. These creepy zombies chase you down to give you 3D glasses which you wear while the living dead is trying to maul you. Everything was painted with glow in the dark neon paint, which made the skulls on the wall literally pop out and every zombie was painted brightly as well, so you knew just how close death was. At the end you walk through a giant vinyl tube that feels like you are trapped but you eventually reach the end. Downside to this tube? It REEKED of body odor. I seriously thought I was going to pass out from the awful smell, but I was sweating like crazy because it was hot and I was all freaked out thinking I was going to die, so I can see how it happens. It was definitely insane which brings me to phase 3...

"Sanctuary of Insanity!" This was probably the BEST and WORST part of the whole place. Definitely the scariest, which is probably why they saved it for last. It's COMPLETELY dark. I mean PITCH BLACK so you are feeling your way through the whole thing and then out of nowhere, creepers with flashlights appear right beside or behind you screaming in your ears. And sometimes when you were searching or feeling for a wall or which way to turn, BOOM... you are actually grabbing a "mental patient." I mean, it was truly the stuff of my nightmares. The very last room had tons of strobe lights going and was filled with crazy people locked in cells all trying to get out and grab you. They were all in straight jackets with crazy hair and make up, but some of them were loose and would just run up RIGHT beside you and screech as loud as possible in your ear and they just kept saying they were going to get you. It was absolutely horrifying. We finally made it to the end, where of course a guy with a chainsaw chases you out. I think that's just a rule if you have a haunted house because I've never been to one that didn't have a crazy chainsaw man at the end.

Anyway, after we caught our breath and realized we weren't going to die, we wandered over to the beer garden to drink our fears away. It was HUGE but it was also completely empty. The bartender was really nice though and told us that usually they have performers/bands/dancers so I'll definitely be going back on a night where they have something going on. Their beer was really, really good and just what I needed after being chased by vampires, zombies and crazies. Even if haunted houses aren't your thing, you should try this one out just to see the makeup and elaborate special effects! It was incredible how life like they make some of their monsters. Even if you can't make it out, at least YouTube their work. They certainly have some talented people working for them! 

Cheers to surviving Bennett's Curse!